Horror and dumb go together like peas and cah-rots, to paraphrase Forrest Gump.
Think: There’s a serial killer on the loose … let’s split up!
The monster sure looks like it’s dead. Let’s drop our weapons!
You know the drill.
“Abigal” is a different kind of dumb. The film’s screenplay insults us at every turn. You can’t help but question what’s happening instead of letting go and having fun.
Young, talented Abigail (Alisha Weir, very good despite the story around her) gets kidnapped as the story opens. The fledgling ballerina is the daughter of a powerful mob boss, and a gaggle of goons hopes to squeeze him for a tidy ransom.
That makes sense, except what the thugs don’t realize is that Abigail is more than a gifted dancer. She’s a vampire, and by kidnapping...